Okay, there are some people who deserve to be tripped, pushed to the ground, have scalding hot coffee poured on them, and then be beaten to a bloody pulp. These people appear to be much more common on my morning commute than they are on the evening one; is it that I’m angrier in the mornings, or that other people are dumber?

Waiting in line for my coffee at McStarbucks, and the barista (when did that job become button-pusher?) calls out a drink; a grande gingerbread latte. Woman waiting in line picks up her drink and exclaims;

YUMMERS!

…

These people are destroying the world. Yummers? What the holy hell are you thinking, lady? This might be cute if you were 5 rather than 45. Did you inhale too much glue at your scrapbooking class, or has yoga finally fried your brain? The sheer volume of people seems to be the biggest downside of working in an office tower that’s attached to Burnaby’s shopping Mecaa; Metrotown Mall.

Then there’s the other day when I was buying a cola at the Dollar Store in the mall. Two sketchy Russian ladies try to cut in line to buy a double armload of (I wish I was kidding) ceramic dolphin things (candy dishes / ashtrays / etc?). I was trying to stay out of the aisle while waiting in line, so these women figure that a 2 foot space in front of me means that I’m just standing around for my health, and they angle in there…

When I step forward, the older one with the warty nose and the cataracts starts talking to her great-great-granddaughter (I’m assuming here, because the one was REALLY old, and the other was merely old) in Russian about how I cut in line and was a big jerk. Yeah, I don’t speak Russian, but Bitchy Old Woman is a universal language. The Dollar Store is the cheapest place to buy soda, but maybe I’ll just walk further and pay more in order to avoid the ceramic dolphin set in future.